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*WARNING: This blog will contain discussion about sexual assault, rape, Donald Trump. So if any of these things may cause anxiety and/or flashbacks, PTSD triggers, etc. Please read with caution.*

Donald Trump has said a lot of really stupid things, we already know this, but I am not here to talk about this. As a survivor of rape, I want to discuss just what this means to me and perhaps many survivors in this country who have fought to see justice. The newscasts, the commentary and even the quotes from Trump himself have all been somewhat triggering to me. Many of us have seen our perpetrators, rapists, etc get away with what they’ve done to us. This isn’t something that happens and you get over it. It’s a lifetime struggle and not only do many (most) of us struggle with having to live with what happened to us, we have to live with the fact that the person who did these things to us is still out there unpunished. We see this everyday.

To see a sexual predator be hailed, held up and given the opportunity to lead a country, to gain power, is a serious kick in the teeth and a sign that this country has not moved forward in dealing with these individuals. It is a sign to me, personally, that what I went through for 10 years means nothing to those who support him and especially, my own government. I’m going to say this, and I don’t care if there are people who will tell me I am wrong, but if this was Obama he would’ve been removed by now. If this was not a white man, they would use the words ‘rape’ more often than ‘assault’. They would revel in dragging him through the mud. But that isn’t the case here. No, instead this man, who has been accused, sued, and proven to be sexist and disrespectful to women is being heralded by half of this country as the perfect man to run this country. It makes me sick. I have no doubt that there are women who support this man who have been raped themselves and for whatever reason, they refuse to realize what this means. I feel sorry for them and can only assume they never got the help they needed or even accepted what they had been through.

His supporters will make excuse after excuse for him. And that tells me that these people do not mind having a rapist for a president. What if Hillary had sexually assaulted someone? Do you really think she would have this many supporters? No, there would be a witch trial against her. Instead, we are more concerned about a woman who used the wrong email than we are about a man who has been accused, on multiple occasions of sexually assaulting women, not to mention being caught on tape making extremely sexist remarks, groping a woman and then using excuse after excuse to try to validate his sick remarks. This is a country that has a long way to go if we want to see women treated like human beings and survivors to get the respect and justice they deserve. This is sad, disgusting, infuriating and embarrassing.

I worry for the safety of survivors who will have to cope with this should he be elected. The depression, set backs, flashbacks, PTSD all flooding back at the thought of having someone like this lead the country. I worry that it will cause many people to feel even more hopeless than they might already, maybe want to hurt themselves. This doesn’t just apply to female survivors but male and trans survivors as well. To support a man like this, sexual predator, is to tell these people, us, that what we went through means nothing and that sexual predators are not accountable for their actions. It is a bitter pill to swallow for me and one that is causing me great anxiety, sadness and hopelessness. It hurts. I don’t know if I have friends who support this man, but if I do, that hurts even more.

This is my worst nightmare. This brings back memories of people telling me to “get over it” or “he didn’t do anything you didn’t let him do” or “well you’re not around him anymore so why worry?”. This country does not feel like a safe place. I don’t feel safe, even more so than before.

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“You know, it doesn’t really matter what [the media] write as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass.” — from an interview with Esquire, 1991

“Women have one of the great acts of all time. The smart ones act very feminine and needy, but inside they are real killers. The person who came up with the expression ‘the weaker sex’ was either very naive or had to be kidding. I have seen women manipulate men with just a twitch of their eye — or perhaps another body part.” — Trump: The Art of the Comeback, 1997

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“My favorite part [of ‘Pulp Fiction’] is when Sam has his gun out in the diner and he tells the guy to tell his girlfriend to shut up. Tell that bitch to be cool. Say: ‘Bitch be cool.’ I love those lines.” — TrumpNation: The Art of Being The Donald, 2005

“I did try and f— her,” Trump tells Bush in reference to a married woman, while acknowledging he was unsuccessful. “I moved on her like a b—- but I couldn’t get there,” Trump says.

“I don’t even wait.” Trump says. “And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything — grab them by the p—-.”

 

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